Latest Stress Articles

Calm Stress With Meditation - The Best Way to a Calmer, Happier You!

Wed, 04 Aug 2010 13:36:17 -0400

If you can't keep up with the pace of your life and you feel like you are running to stand still, then perhaps you need to unwind. Meditation is a fantastic way to calm stress and feel wonderfully calm and energised. When you meditate regularly, it not only helps you to release tension from your body but has many benefits in terms of your health, happiness and well-being.

At its simplest, when you meditate you try to relax the body as much as possible and free the mind from its continuous stream of thoughts by not paying attention to them. This can be difficult for beginners but it is worth persevering. Just 5 minutes a day can start to show benefits.

Unfortunately, most of the time, we generally have so much activity going on in our minds, that they are rarely still, and for most people much of this babble is negative and self-defeating. If you can free your mind from its constant chatter, you can experience a profound sense of peace and tranquility and start to get to know your inner being, that internal connection with the "oneness" of the universe.

As you meditate, your thoughts start to reduce and your brain waves become slower. This leads to beneficial chemicals being released by the brain which help to restore your body and mind to a state of balance. The body is able to work to repair itself and the mind becomes clearer and more focused.

When this happens regularly, more positive patterns are induced in the brain. Over time these become a chemical habit in the brain and you start to gain greater control your emotions and physical and mental state. A regular meditator generally develops a more positive view of life and more compassion and understanding for others. What better way could there be to overcome stress, become a happier person and gain profound realisations about life?

Stop Stressing - Don't Look Back

Wed, 09 Jun 2010 12:10:19 -0400

The past can be a problematic albatross to carry around. We'll forget where we left our keys 20 minutes ago, but ask us to remember an embarrassing moment from our childhood and it will come to mind like a flash. For some reason, we seem incredibly predisposed toward reminiscing over troubling events. We replay and replay them in our minds until we can't focus on anything else but feeling mortified and wondering if we made the right decision.

Simply trying not to think about the problem doesn't necessarily help, either. Studies suggest that simply trying to ignore a thought process doesn't work; in fact, it can lead to thinking more about the very thing we're trying to forget. This builds and builds, until we're so worried about the past that we can't live in the present like we're meant to, and the stress of things that aren't relevant anymore is still tearing us apart.

What's needed is a system — a way of approaching the problem piece by piece and addressing each part until we can settle it logically.

Step One - Interrupt the Thoughts

As we've discussed before, good habits can be built on other good habits. They reinforce one another, each one making the others stronger and more resilient. To that end, if you find yourself endlessly replaying your bad conversations, interrupt the cycle with the STOP method we've discussed before.

Say "Stop" aloud: This verbal affirmation serves as a trigger for the habit and a reminder to yourself.

Take a Breath and a Breather: Give yourself a few seconds to practice your deep breathing habit and get your body's physical responses under control, then take five minutes to unwind and explicitly focus on something uplifting and soothing.

Own Your Outcome: Remember to list several of the goals you've set for yourself, as well as the next step you're going to take to make them yours.

Praise Yourself: Go over what you've accomplished thus far, including the most recent steps you've taken toward your goals.

Again, this will reinforce the strength of the STOP method overall, allowing you to integrate it more fully into your habit-building process. After thirty days of practice, it will seem like second nature.

Step Two - Analyze the Thoughts

Remember that thinking things through logically helps defeat illogical worries and unnecessary stresses. If we can contextualize the problems we're dealing with, they can't do as much damage and never seem quite as worrying as they did before we thought them through.

Once you've used the STOP method, take a moment to go over your thoughts thus far, piece by piece.

First, ask yourself why the event happened the way it did. Look at the whole matter fairly and objectively. What reasons could the other parties have had for reacting like they did? What are some good reasons they might have had, and what are some bad ones? Why did you react the way you did? What were your reasons, good or bad?

Be fair in your assessment, both to yourself and the other party. There's nothing to be gained from inaccurate, angry criticism. To make this an approachable habit that's easy to integrate, break it into small steps. First, think about the problem as a whole, then list one good and bad reason for your actions and the other parties' actions. Three easy steps make this a habit that's simple to adopt.

Step Three - Make a Wish

Now that you've gotten the problem into context, consider ways to use it as a learning experience. Given the benefit of time, distance and perspective, what do you wish you had done instead?

Worrying about and regretting the choice you made is a good sign that you might have made the wrong choice, so take some time to consider it. Was there something you might have said that would have made more sense? Would a calmer reaction have made the situation better? Write down several wishes you have for how the situation might have gone instead.

Also, consider another option. If one of your wishes can be fulfilled now, do so! Even late, good actions are a great way to make amends.

Step Four - Resolve to do Better

With the scope of the problem firmly in mind, and with your wishes stated for how it might have gone instead, it's time to take the next step. Very specifically, write down your biggest regrets about the situation. Confront your worries realistically, be they about the situation itself, about how you handled it or about what's come about as a result of the encounter. Then make a decision about each one.

If your problem was your tone, dedicate yourself to exercising control of your voice the next time you have an argument. If your regret lies in not listening, resolve to be more attentive to what others have to say every time you speak to someone. Then tear the paper up and set it aside. If the worries try to push themselves back into your head, say "that was then, this is now," and find a way to act on one of your affirmative resolutions.

Stop Stressing - Resist the Urge to Time Travel

Fri, 04 Jun 2010 22:58:24 -0400

For creatures that supposedly only exist in the present, we sure do a lot of time traveling. We worry about tomorrow, we fret over yesterday, and all the while our current status gets neglected.

Some of our most distracting worries aren't even the current ones. Frequently we'll drag ourselves down by worrying about tomorrow and whether we're really ready for it, or we'll fail to get things done today because we're still beating ourselves up for the gaffe we made yesterday, or for not doing something we planned on doing. If we're going to make the best of our efforts to relieve stress and get to where we want to be, we need to make a habit of making the most out of the present, instead of letting time-traveling worries get the best of us.

Step #1 - You're OK

One mistake we often fall into is trying to stop thinking about something without substituting anything in its place. This isn't really possible, because the act of trying to stop thinking means you are thinking. For example, try to go 10 minutes without thinking about a polar bear on a beach. It's hard, isn't it?

Instead, substitute a positive thought for the negative ones. When you feel yourself worrying about tomorrow or fretting about something that happened, interrupt the process. Take a deep, steadying breath, and say aloud "I am OK now." What happened has happened, you can't change it. What's going to happen isn't here yet, and there's probably time to plan for it. Instead, focus yourself on what's good in the here and now, and remind yourself of it.

Step #2 - Physical Reminders

Habits grow stronger when they have a physical component to go along with the action themselves. The reason many religious rituals are so ingrained into our culture is the physical parts that reinforce the idea and help build the habit. Take advantage of this by carrying around an "I'm OK" card.

On one side of the card, write "I'm OK" along with three reasons. "I'm OK because... there's food in the house," or "I'm OK because... I live in a beautiful neighborhood to walk in." Your reasons can be your own, but make sure they appeal to you and your sense of well-being.

On the other side of the card, write down three things you've accomplished recently. Big or small — doesn't matter, just put down something you've managed to do. Once you've verified your reasons for being OK, flip over and remind yourself of your progress and that it's helped bring you to the point of being OK. Do this every time you start to worry about the past, present or future, and build a steady habit of controlling your thoughts.

Step #3 - Take "Now" Actions

As we've said, activities can help bring your thoughts to the present instead of stuck in time travel mode. Play a game with your family, or play with a pet. These activities will force you to the present, and keep your mind focused on something specific.

Alternatively, stop and read a book for a few minutes. It doesn't have to be a long time, just enough time to start following the plot of the story instead of worrying about problems that are either gone or not yet here. Interestingly, our brains can process things on multiple levels. When we sleep or relax, our brains aren't completely "off." They're often working on our problems behind the scenes without bothering our conscious mind. So let your brain do the work for you while you enjoy yourself and live in the moment.

Step #4 - Be Impulsive

Our thoughts get into patterns, just like our behaviors do. Sometimes even a verbal interruption and a look at our card isn't going to be a drastic enough change. This is OK, because that isn't their purpose. Those steps and habit-building behaviors are intended to work gradually over an extended period of time. They mold our behavior steadily. However, sometimes you need more of a shock to get things worked on.

Take a day off of work if you have it, and go somewhere exciting. Ride a roller coaster at an amusement park, or go see a really great movie you've been considering for a bit. Do something outside your normal routine and force your mind to engage with it. This can help you get your mind in the right context to make your smaller, more gradual steps more effective the next day.

Step #5 - Talk it Up

Sometimes, we need a little help. Building a habit can be easier when we have a partner, after all. Make a point of talking to someone about how good things are, and how things are working out for you. A conversation focused on the present is a great way to get your attention centered in the here and now.

As with all habits, talking works best when it's part of a routine. Make an appointment for the same time of day or time of week to meet with your talking buddy. Have a nice, no-strings and no-worries chat over coffee every Friday, and let your mind relax from its time traveling worries.

Stop Stressing - Breathe Deep

Sun, 30 May 2010 06:11:50 -0400

Everyone knows how important breathing is to the body. In an emergency, we can go weeks without food and several days without water or sleep. We won't be in the best of health, but it is possible to survive without these necessities in a pinch. However, anyone who goes more than a few seconds without breathing begins to feel incredibly uncomfortable!

Breathing is central to the way the body processes energy, for a start. Oxygen processed by the lungs is used to release energy from stored cells, just like it releases heat energy in the form of fire. This is why we find ourselves breathing faster in a crisis — our body senses that we might need energy quickly and is stepping up production.

Knowing this, we can turn breathing from something that just happens automatically into a powerful, stress-controlling habit that allows us to regulate the way our body processes its energy. By focusing and steadying our breathing to a slower, more reasonable pace, we reduce the rush of energy we're experiencing and bring our emotions more under control. For those of us looking to reduce stress in our lives, following are a few tips on how to make breathing into a life-affirming habit.

Tip #1 - Practice!

Breathing is largely an automatic system, making the idea of practicing seem a bit odd at first. However, all habits take some time to fit into our lives. For example, consider our S.T.O.P. method: It has a very specific purpose, but it can be awkward the first few times we use it. However, by using it and practicing it whenever we can, we soon find it becoming second nature.

As with all important habits, timing is key. Schedule a specific time of the day that you will practice your breathing. It doesn't have to be a long period, any specific time set aside becomes cemented in the mind with only a few repetitions. The key is to make it the same time every day, to help mold the habit into the flow of your life.

Tip #2 - Go Slow

As we said earlier, breathing quickly releases more energy. Nervous energy is a big part of negative stress, so take advantage of slowing your breathing to help control it.

During your exercise time, take a moment to lie down. Start small, with an easy step that you can manage. Breathe in, counting to three as you do, and then exhale for three seconds as well. Continue doing this until it feels comfortable and natural, and then gradually increase the time by three seconds. Never force it, if you feel that six or nine seconds is too long, go back to a smaller interval. As with all habits, shocking your body is not the way to do it — give yourself time to adjust and adapt.

Tip #3 - Use the S.T.O.P. Method

In another article, we discuss the S.T.O.P. method of controlling negative emotions. There is a wonderful opportunity to combine the S.T.O.P. method and breathing control into the same process, helping reinforce each habit with the other. Habits are strongest when they're part of an integrated system, rather than standing on their own.

So, when negative thoughts come to mind and you reach for the S.T.O.P. process, take a slow, measured breath as well. Breathe in slowly, and exhale slowly, repeating several times to relax yourself. Your feelings of calm and relaxation will make the S.T.O.P. method more effective, and the S.T.O.P. instinct will remind you that breathing is important as well.

Tip #4 - Be Observant

Taking time to control your breathing every day is important, but equally important is observing how stress affects your breathing, and vice versa.

Throughout your day, take a few seconds here and there to see how your breathing compares between different events. Do you breathe differently at the beginning of the day compared to the end? How did the big surprise project that came up at work affect your breathing rhythm? How much did using a breath control technique help you cope with sudden changes? Knowing little things like this can help you adjust your breathing exercises for the maximum effect that you need.

Tip #5 - Take a Breather... Literally

You don't need to reserve breath control methods for crisis situations. Yes, breath control is a valuable tool in these events, and can help you calm down. Conversely, it can also help you perk up and get the lift you need when you feel overwhelmed.

If you're in the middle of a big project, but have a few seconds to take a break, remember to work a short breathing exercise into the moment. It doesn't have to be long, simply give yourself one minute to practice breathing in and out in short, measured pulses. This will help you moderate and control the energy you're using and will relieve that 'long grind' tension that can come with a tough work day.

Above all, take every opportunity to practice that you can find. Stick to one five-minute breathing workout per day, but also find time to stop, take a steadying breath and then continue on when you can. The extra effort will make the 30 days it takes to solidify this habit seem to breeze right by.

Stop Stressing - Just Say No

Fri, 14 May 2010 00:16:39 -0400

As many people have commented at one time or another, we could get so much more done if there were just more hours in the day. Obligations pile up everywhere: duties at work, commitments to social groups, quality time with the family and time out to spend with friends… For whatever reason, there always seems to be some kind of demand (or worse, a polite request) on our time. Yet this wishing for more time in the day is missing the real point of the problem, which is actually quite different.

What's the problem, then?

To be entirely fair without being harsh, we are the problem. More accurately, it's our inability to say no. We accept new burdens because we want to be helpful. We take on harder projects because we think we can handle it if we just work it out properly. And we acquiesce to little requests because, after all, they aren't that big of a deal, are they?

Soon enough, we've said yes to so many things that there isn't enough time to do all of them healthily. We end up cutting into our sleeping, eating and recreational time to make room for all of our big activities, and in the end we suffer for it. For some reason, the idea of cutting out some of our excess commitments doesn't seem to occur to us. However, if reducing stress really is the goal, it's time that we learn to use the power of a well phrased 'no.'

Making No a Habit

Step 1 - Start Thinking

Put an automatic moratorium on any request that doesn't give you time to think about things. If it's anything larger than handing a bit of paper to your coworker because they're out, ask for five minutes to think about it. For bigger issues, ask for more time to think things over, up to an entire day or even a week.

In many cases, the problem lies in accepting requests automatically. Someone presents their case to you and sounds like they genuinely need help, so you say 'well, alright,' and automatically bend yourself to their need. Then they know they can rely on you, so they come again, and you say yes again... and you can see where this is leading.

If the request is genuinely important — but not an emergency — it can allow for a bit of time that you can use to think things over. Thinking about the problem might allow you to see a different solution, or recommend someone who has less on his or her plate, or even that you really can't say yes after all. Sometimes the best 'no' is phrased as, 'not right now.' Make it as automatic as saying yes was previously; no matter what they ask, tell them you'll deal with it after you've had a chance to think. This will help you build the habit as a strong, reliable defense mechanism.

Step 2 - Stop Small

One of the easiest ways to get into trouble with time management is in accepting small requests for your time automatically, because they're so small. After all, they don't take up much time and aren't asking a whole lot, so why not?

However, we've discussed how every behavior can become a habit. If we begin saying yes to small requests on our time without thinking about them, we train ourselves into a habit of doing so, even when it might be advisable not to do it.

As an example of the impact a small request can have, consider a day you have planned out. You get up, make breakfast, see the family off to school and go to work. You have your day planned out so you can leave work a few minutes early and go home, thus beating the rush hour, when someone asks if you'll just real quick run this one file upstairs, it won't take half a second. Then you get caught in the rush, and you get home feeling frazzled. Only a small inconvenience perhaps, but imagine what will happen when you make it a habit, day in and day out?

Start finding ways to politely decline small requests, because you don't want them to become a very big headache.

Step 3 - Start Committing

We all make plans. Plans are a good thing; they help us order our lives and tasks so that we can spend less time doing what we don't like and the most time doing what we love. It's when these plans go awry that stress begins to make itself known, and this is the very worst time to bend on our convictions.

We do have a right to stick to our plans. Yes, perhaps we haven't seen our friends in a while and it wouldn't take that long to have a fun night out, but maybe we really did just want that nice quiet dinner at home with our favorite album playing and the phone turned off. No one has an inarguable right to our time, and just because someone asked is no reason to derail our plans.

There's never any call to be rude, of course, but there is plenty of call to be firm. If you've made plans and your first gut reaction to any request to change them is, 'but I was going to...' then politely say, 'I'm sorry, but I have plans.' Don't feel you have to explain them. Often times doing so will invite the interrupter to compare or dismiss them. Simply state you have plans, and they can't be changed. Do not bend on it. Keep it up for those first three weeks that are needed to build a good starting habit. Soon enough, saying 'no' will become so easy that the times you do say yes will be all the more meaningful.

Stop Stressing - Getting Away from Should

Wed, 05 May 2010 02:29:42 -0400

People like to have a sense of purpose about things. We want to know that we're doing the right thing, and that our activities are going along according to "the plan." In short, we spend a lot of time either saying "I should..." or asking ourselves "what should I..."

The problem with this mindset is that it ends up being a prison for the spirit rather than a pathway to success. When we say "I should do x," very often that x doesn't refer to something we came up with. Instead, we're almost always referring to things that other people have said we "should" be doing. We should be walking every day, we should be eating this diet not that diet, we should just relax and not take everything so seriously.

There's another common element to the usual "I shoulds" we tend to burden ourselves with — they're horribly nonspecific. They don't tell you why, leaving you to fill in the gaps yourself. They're meaningless statements that don't fit into a proper, healthy, holistic worldview that can let you benefit. Almost every time we say "I should," we follow it up with "but." Then we let ourselves dwell on the problems that get in the way of our goal, and we lose the energy to deal with anything as stress continues to build up and rob us of the good life. Before long it's ingrained and habitual, and we can't see a way out.

Instead of getting hung up on the "I shoulds" that keep tearing our confidence down, let's look at the way we can harness the power of "I want," and "I will."

Step One - Decide What YOU Want

As we said, many "I shoulds" come from thinking about the desires and proclamations of people that aren't you. This is what makes it so bad to adopt a should habit. The fact that they aren't you is the biggest problem; your life and your problems are unique, requiring their own perspective. What works for someone else may not work for you, but the moment that you say, "I should at least try," you give the idea its own merit.

Instead, remember to sit down and inventory what you WANT out of life. Remind yourself what stress has done to you, and what it's taken from you. Remember why you want it gone, and why you chose to try and remove its influence on you. Habits are built from desires, whether conscious or unconscious. Choosing to go from something that you want, something that pleases you, will make it much easier to hold onto that habit in the future. This is because it will be entirely yours, instead of a burden imposed by someone else.

Step Two - Review Your Tasks

On some level, the instinct of "should" comes out of needing to schedule our lives. We think we should get the car looked at because we don't want it to break down and strand us on the highway, for example. This is a pretty reasonable way of looking at things, on the surface. Then again, if we have a good reason for getting the car serviced, it isn't really a "should" so much as a want. We WANT a car that works well, and gets us to work. We're not doing it because someone said we should, but to meet a need we have.

This week, go over the things that you have scheduled or intend to take care of. Ask yourself why they're on the schedule— are they there to keep up appearances, to please someone else, to maintain status quo or put off conflict? These are "shoulds," and are probably taking up a lot of your energy through worrying. If they're there because you want them to be, then they're not a "should" and are alright.

Step Three - Act On Your Wants

In the end, everything we do because we "should" is just putting off the problem. It builds up those bad habits that get us stuck in a rut and let stress build up in our lives. We avoid an argument one more day because we "should" be peacemakers. Instead, take the initiative and break these bad habits by acting on good desires.

A major part of building up good habits is clearing out old ones so you have room. Every bad habit we have can be replaced with a good one, given enough time and consistent effort. Instead of avoiding a lingering conflict because you "should" keep the peace, initiate a discussion about it because you WANT to feel better and stop worrying.

Step Four - Be Gradual

As we've discussed before, major changes are hard to turn into habits. Almost nobody changes immediately and overnight. It's going to take the same steady, deliberate series of changes to get from "should" to "want," and there's no reason to feel bad about that. Take small steps, beginning with you. When you feel yourself saying, "I should take care of this..." ask yourself why. Start things out by taking the time to just think about why you feel a certain way. The very act of thinking on things will give you a new sense of control and direction that you may find surprising, and ultimately rewarding.

Stop Stressing: Visualize Success

Mon, 26 Apr 2010 14:12:59 -0400

Our vivid imaginations often have the power to alleviate or exacerbate stressful situations. On the one hand, we can come up with a lot of different solutions for the same problems; yet on the other, we also can create all manner of roadblocks for ourselves almost out of thin air.

The human mind is an incredible tool with the ability to envision all kinds of scenarios, and it is this capacity that can be your best ally or worst enemy as you're trying to combat stress. After all, stress that's caused by warranted things such as an emergency or an unexpectedly hard day at the office is troublesome enough, so why would we want to invent stress?

We're going to discuss a few ways to turn our mind from an enemy into our friend. We've discussed the S.T.O.P. method in another article, and this technique builds on that tool. Once we're in the habit of calling out our bad thoughts and pushing them out of the way, it's time to put good thoughts and positive visualizations in their place. The mind will fill up emptiness with more thoughts, so why not use these techniques to make sure they're thoughts that help, not hinder?

Visual Aid #1 - See the Goal

Remember that we're not taking all these steps just to make our life more complicated or make ourselves feel bad! We each have a goal to reach, and these steps are part of the trip to that goal. So visualize yourself succeeding, and see yourself how you want to be. Imagine how good it will be to wake up not worrying about the rest of the day, and how great it will feel to go to bed knowing you have a handle on your problems.

As we know, stress has a major effect on our bodies. Too much of it can make us tense up, leading to bad posture and muscle aches or cramps. Imagine a good night's sleep without those aches and pains, or without the headache that comes from worrying about a problem for hours and hours. See the goal, and keep it in mind.

Visual Aid #2 - See the StepsM

There's a trick that some runners use to keep themselves on track during a long course. Sometimes the goal does feel very far away, and it can be hard to see yourself getting from 'here' to 'there' at any one moment. Runners deal with this by picking out a landmark or feature a few minutes ahead of them, and choosing to reach it for the time being. The long journey then becomes a series of smaller stints that the runner can manage, and before long the finish line is in sight.

This is a powerful technique that works for visualizing efforts too. While you're considering the goal, it might occur to you that all those nice results are a bit far away. Don't panic, and instead start visualizing the steps toward that goal. Consider the important ones you've already made, and look to the next one. This will give you insights about how easy the course really is, and give you the courage to make each small step that will build up to those strong habits, a day or a week at a time.

Visual Aid #3 - See Your Friends and Family

A big part of why we don't want to be stressed out is the effect it has on our friends and family. We miss out on fun activities because of stress headaches, we snap at someone when maybe we shouldn't, or we are so distracted and irritated that we simply forget how much fun our loved ones can be.

As your next visual technique, spend a little time each day thinking about how your newfound outlook will help your family. Imagine being able to say 'yes' to more enjoyement because stress headaches are a thing of the past. Visualize how you want your evenings with your loved ones to be, instead of how they often end up because of stress. Remember that a small, conscious bit of time devoted to each step, each day will build up your habit into a rock-solid lifestyle.

Visual Aid #4 - See It Can Be Done

Some of us aren't naturally visual people, or so we say. We've tried and tried to visualize things, but it just doesn't work. However, don't you find it easy to visualize how easily things can go wrong? Or even if it is true that you can't really see, is it genuinely because it's something you can't do, or is it just something you can't do--yet?

Any habit is hard to get into at first. Remember that it can take about sixty days for a habit to cement in your life sometimes. Try it, even if it seems to come hard. If you can't visualize it in your mind, draw something on a fresh page of your stress log, even if it's just a small smiley face with a note about something you found positive today. These little steps will add up, and will become much more natural as the days and weeks go on.

A Last Note

Sometimes, our visual mind doesn't work on its own, but responds well to other people's visuals. Ask someone to share a thought or a visual with you, about how to fight stress. This can be a 'stress buddy' or a family member, or even someone you only just met. Take their idea and run with it, and see where the thoughts take you. You just might be pleasantly surprised.

Good luck, and here's to stress free living.

How to Overcome Social Anxiety

Thu, 22 Apr 2010 06:19:42 -0400

Being nervous in a crowded room is one thing, but being nervous when in front of a small group of people is another. Social anxiety can turn normally enjoyable outings into nightmares; the constant fare of being watched or scrutinized can almost drive one insane. But it does not have to be this way, there are many methods recommended by psychologists to help persons overcome their social anxiety. One of the most effective methods is games; simple mind games that you can play to take your mind away from seeing everyone as a critic, because in reality most people are ready to accept you as you are.

The first game I’m going to talk about is one built by students of McGill University, it is called EyeSpy. The whole point of EyeSpy is to help you see the smiling/approving faces instead of the disapproving ones. This may sound simple, but the biggest cause of social anxiety is the fear of not being accepted. Even if you do not consciously do it, your brain interprets smiling faces as accepting and friendly, so you will generally feel more comfortable around somebody who likes to smile as opposed to persons who have a “normal” or angry face.

The second game is also one developed by students of McGill University; this game is used to build self esteem. Low self-esteem is also a leading factor in social anxiety, feeling that you are not as important as the person next to you can make you nervous. If you can build your self esteem, you will feel more comfortable around other people. Although this may seem childish, it is one of the most important steps in overcoming social anxiety.

The last game I am going to talk about is one that you do not need a computer to play. This is a on-the-spot mind game that you can use to combat nervousness when in front of large groups of people. Image everyone around you wearing nothing but their underwear, yes I am sure you have heard this before but it really does work. Most people would be humiliated if caught in public with only their underwear covering them. Image everyone around you is humiliated and you are the only one with nothing to be ashamed of. As a public speaker I can tell you from first-hand experience that this mind game works.

Social anxiety is never a good thing; it can affect very important aspects of your life, so taking the time to overcome it is totally worth it. Changing the way you think about yourself and the way you perceive other takes time; it will not happen overnight. But, if you follow these steps I guarantee that you will see improvement in your daily interactions with other people; you will not be as anxious and you will find yourself more “free spirited” and outgoing than ever before. Games are often better than taking a therapy to cure the anxiety, primarily because they are fun and can be so involving that one puts aside any worries.

Reduce Stress through Elements Therapeutic Massage for Optimum Health

Sun, 18 Apr 2010 23:39:44 -0400

Most people think immediately of relaxation and stress relief when they think of massage, and that is certainly one of the benefits of receiving a massage from a trained therapist. Massage is often thought of as a relaxing special treat or indulgent escape, but massage therapy actually has more far reaching effects on body and spirit. According to the American Institute of Stress, stress can not only effect mood and behavior, but can have an effect on systems, organs and tissues throughout the body. In fact, there are numerous physical conditions that are linked to stress, and stress can further aggravate disease or injury.

The highly qualified massage therapists at Elements Therapeutic Massage-Scottsdale Promenade provide an effective way to combat and release stress, as well as providing clients with many positive physiological effects through various massage techniques. Whether using the soothing touch of a Therapeutic Swedish massage to relax and rejuvenate or releasing toxins through Therapeutic Hot Stone Massage, Elements therapists enhance their clients' overall health.

Therapeutic Deep Tissue massage is a highly effective technique that focuses on realigning deeper layers of muscles and connective tissue. Through deep tissue massage, the immune system can be enhanced and toxins are flushed from the body. Massage also increases circulation and stimulates the lymph system. This allows the body to more effectively move oxygen and nutrients throughout the body, and can improve the body's natural defense system for fighting off disease and illness. Massage also releases endorphins, which are the body's natural pain-killers. Endorphins aid in recovery, managing pain and maintaining an overall sense of well being in the body. This type of massage can benefit anyone who wants to maintain overall health, as well as those recovering from illness or dealing with chronic conditions. Elements therapists consult with their clients to integrate deep tissue massage with other massage therapies for maximum personalized health benefits.

For the physically active, Therapeutic Sports massage can be used before, during and after training and events to reduce injuries and alleviate tissue inflammation. This technique is effective for novice athletes, serious competitors, or those who are working out simply for health or weight loss. Sometimes those who are returning to regular physical activity or who have increased their workouts significantly can experience injury or discomfort. Exercise can result in stress on joints, ligaments and tendons. Sports massage can relax and soften overused muscles, while reducing cramping and muscle spasms. It can also increase joint flexibility. Trained massage therapists can target problem areas and injuries, allowing clients to successfully stay with their exercise routine and meet their training goals.

As Elements massage therapists use their specialized training and expertise to relieve physical tension and muscle stress, they are most likely releasing emotional stress as well. Elements Therapeutic Massage clients report not only relief of their physical symptoms, but the benefit of a relaxed and renewed spirit as well. They know that massage isn't just for occasional pampering, but is part of a regular routine of reducing stress and maintaining optimum health and well being.

Stop Stressing - How to Log It and Block It

Wed, 07 Apr 2010 02:08:57 -0400

An interesting thing about the human mind is that it tends to work largely on autopilot. Whether it is showering, driving to work, or making breakfast, there are large parts of our daily routines that occur without needing much conscious thought.

This is a normal, healthy behavior. If we had to stop and consider or manually cause every single action in our lives, we'd be slow moving creatures indeed. That said, there are times that this tendency can give us trouble. It isn't so much a direct problem as an indirect one of allowing stresses to build up without really analyzing them. We go through our lives every day with tiny stresses coming up again and again, and we don't always take the time to consider how we can deal with them or even where they come from, because of our automatic acceptance of the routine.

Today, let's focus on redirecting that routine. Just as the mind can adopt behaviors as automatic, it can be made to think about them and break them down into meaningful pieces of information. To that end, we're going to look at a life-building habit called a Stress Log.

What is a Stress Log?

In short, a stress log is a record of our day and the activities in it. The record begins when we wake up, and takes account of everything we encounter and do throughout the day so that later we can look at the information and make healthy decisions about it. The first step in any process of building a habit is knowledge, after all.

The exact form the stress log takes isn't important. It can be a program in our Smartphone, a document on the computer, or a physical book. What is most important is that it is something we are comfortable using on a regular basis and can easily access.

Stress Log Step 1 - Diary Daily

The first step in building up a good Stress Logging habit is to make sure to do it every day. When we have more information to work with, we have a better grasp on what needs to be done. The most consistent routine in our lives is usually the daily one, and the one we can most immediately affect. That's why the saying, 'one day at a time,' rings so true.

It takes about thirty days to first establish a good solid habit, as we've discussed. We can't get to thirty without first getting to one. So for starters, we'll make our journal one of daily progress.

Stress Log Step 2 - Piece by Piece

Now that we have our stress log, it's time to begin filling it in. We can begin with the elements of our routine. Good things to note include the time we wake up, what we make for breakfast, how and when we went to work, schools, or about our chores, and the like.

Nothing is too immaterial. If we notice it, it should go in the book because our brain considered it important. We shouldn't let this interrupt our work of course; if something is big and needs attention, it should be dealt with, and then after it has been handled it should be noted in the log.

This practice builds information in two ways. First, it creates a steady log of information about our day that we can use as a reference. This will let us look at trends, see patterns, and understand the various elements that make up the complicated picture of our lives. The second thing it does is help us build the habit of observation. As we write down the things we notice, we begin to notice more things, increasing our perception of the world around us and the effects it has on us.

Stress Log Step 3 - Thoughts and Tidbits

As we build up the list of our activities, it is important to note down our thoughts of those activities in the stress log along with them. For example we could record a discussion with a coworker, and whether it made us pleased, indifferent, or more stressed out. We could put down whether the sandwich at lunch was more disappointing than usual, or if getting in late to work caused us problems getting things done.

This piece of information is critical to the process of later analysis. In building a habit of considering and evaluating our world and the stimuli it gives us, we need to know what effect all this information and experience has on our lives.

Stress Log Step 4 - Study and Summary

The important thing at first is to avoid trying to change anything right away. Changing matters at random might not help us, and could cause more stress. Instead, we're just going to journal honestly as we go along.

Then, at the end of each week of logging, we can evaluate our experiences throughout the week and see if we can start identifying the areas that cause us the most stress. This will let us make strong choices to adapt and possibly change things, giving us the ability to reshape our habits into the mold we want, instead of one that happens on autopilot.